What I Offer

I run training sessions for private groups, schools, companies, or any centre or organisation.

I can work with young people and/or adults, in English and Portuguese and I can travel anywhere in the UK and Portugal.

I am a qualified trainer. I have run many workshops in England and Portugal and I have experience of working with a wide range of people and topics.

My workshops are usually very practical, with examples from real life. I encourage people to participate actively, in order to practice what has been learned.

I can plan tailor-made programmes, in terms of content and duration, to meet the needs of your particular group.

Workshops last from between 2-4 hrs to a full day, a whole weekend or longer. They can be single events or regular weekly meetings, in whatever form will suit you.

My experience is that groups of about 6-12 work best, but I will consider other sizes.

The cost varies according to duration, room rental, my expenses, as well the usual terms for the location. The maximum I will charge is £90 per hour for my time. I will consider discounts to non-profit making organisations.


TOPICS
I can run training sessions on different aspects of personal development such as:

• self-knowledge or self-awareness,
• dealing with stress and looking after yourself better,
• communication and listening skills,
• assertiveness,
• giving and receiving feedback,
• anger management,
• conflict resolution
• parenting

Here are some of these areas covered in more detail:


Parenting

To be a mum or a dad can be very rewarding and bring a sense of joy and meaning to one’s life. It can also be very hard and many parents encounter situations with their children that feel too challenging.

To be a parent is probably one of the hardest things ever asked of anybody. It is a task for which most people have not had any training. In addition it is common for parents to repeat patterns from their upbringing, possibly based on an authoritarian approach, or conversely lacking authority which they may feel uncomfortable with and find ineffective.

Many parents face daily difficulties, feeling very isolated and inadequate.

I can offer workshops to help parents learn how to improve their parenting or I can facilitate support groups where parents meet regularly to share their experiences, seek support from each other, in order to feel less alone and more confident.

These groups or workshops can be an opportunity for parents to learn new ways of understanding better what is happening in their families and to cope better with the challenging behaviours of their children, without damaging their relationship to them.

The overall aim of these sessions is to promote better relationships within the family and help parents to ensure their own wellbeing as well as their children’s, in a regular and consistent way.

Some common specific aims can be:

1. To understand parent’s difficulties and learn to recognise and meet one’s needs in more effective ways;
2. To understand the challenging behaviours of children, to learn to recognise their needs and  to help them meet them in more appropriate ways;
3. To introduce tools to deal with challenging situations, to learn more assertive and non-violent ways of communicating and practise the use of these.

The duration, frequency and format of sessions can be adapted to meet the needs of each group.

Here are some of the most common specific topics I can help you with:

• Getting on with your child(ren)
• Coping with your teenager(s)
• Understanding children’s behaviour
• Dealing with tantrums
• Dealing with challenging behaviour
• Shouting less and co-operating more
• Sorting out arguments and resolving conflict
• Sibling rivalry
• Helping children learn
• Dealing with anger
• Talking about sex
• Dealing with stress
• Helping children’s self-esteem
• Bringing up confident children
• Living in multi-cultural families
• Dealing with changes and loss

During the 5 years I worked with Parentline Plus in England I run hundreds of workshops for parents from a wide range of backgrounds and family circumstances. Time and again I saw how parenting can be improved with some simple tools and by developing an array of skills that can transform family life and significantly improve relationships between parents and children.


Non-Violent or Compassionate Communication

What is Non-Violent Communication?
It is a language that is both assertive and empathic. It is a way of understanding what is going on for us before we act, so that we are able to express what we need in a clear and effective way. It is also a way of understanding what is going on for others and acknowledging their situation. Non-Violent Communication helps to make it more likely that others will listen to and understand us without feeling attacked. It then becomes possible to obtain what we need more easily and with less pain, whilst at the same time keeping a healthy relationship with others.

Where and how can you use it?
Non-Violent Communication can be used formally in mediation and conflict resolution or less formally in all day-to-day situations. It can be used in any relationship – in the family, between parents and children, amongst siblings, between couples, at work, between managers and employees, in schools between teachers and pupils, with the general public, amongst friends, even with strangers. Non-Violent Communication can be helpful in any situation where there might be problems or conflicts, and can help people find win-win solutions.

Workshops
I can organise training events for you to learn and practise Non-Violent or Compassionate Communication in whatever form and at whatever level will suit your group.
It is for instance possible to have a full day or weekend workshop to introduce the basics. In these weekend courses you can begin to learn a new way of being with yourself and others. They can provide an opportunity to improve your self-knowledge and your ability to deal with challenging situations. These workshops are very practical and easy going, and you will be able to practice using real life examples.
It is also possible to have shorter events, focusing on one particular aspect.
I can organise training sessions for more advanced learning and practising as well.
 

Dealing With Stress

Many people are confronted nowadays with life situations where they feel tense, stressed or even anxious. With time, these temporary uncomfortable feelings can turn into more permanent physical or mental health problems.

Sometimes one can feel powerless to deal with these situations and unable to change what needs changing in order to recover the lost sense of balance and wellbeing.

I can organise workshops to help you learn more effective ways of dealing with these problems. These are some of the topics that can be covered:

• Identify the areas of stress in your life and learn to change situations that can be changed.
• Learn relaxation techniques to deal more effectively with tension and anxiety.
• Know yourself better by learning to recognise your sensations and feelings and what they tell you about how life is going for you. 
• Become more effective at identifying your true needs and at meeting them, by choosing strategies that work better.
• Reassess your priorities to obtain what is really important for you.
• Learn to notice the negative automatic thoughts that are causing your discomfort and learn new tools to replace them.
• Learn to love yourself and others more
• Develop your assertiveness and respect your individuality so that you can have healthier relationships.

Conflict Resolution

Conflicts are inevitable because people want different things. It is common for people to have conflicting expectations of each other, to wish that things happen in different ways or to want that others behave differently.

Even if it is impossible to avoid conflict, it is possible to deal with conflict situations in ways that make it more likely for all involved to get more of what they want without necessarily damaging their relationships.   

This can be achieved by developing your awareness of your wants and needs.

This first step needs then to be complemented with an openness to understand the wants and needs of others. Without this basic attitude of self-respect and then respect for others it is hard to find effective ways of dealing with conflict.

The next step is to find ways to express your wants and listen to the wishes of others. It is helpful to try to avoid judging, accusing or blaming others in this process.

I can help you through the process of conflict resolution by teaching you how to recognise your needs and wants and by teaching you better ways of listening and identifying the needs of others.

I can then help you to express yourself in an assertive and respectful way that facilitates the process of reaching compromise agreements.

I can run training sessions for groups on all or any of these aspects of conflict resolution, as well as basic mediation.

I have some experience of mediation in neighbour disputes and I can also help mediating conflicts within the family, at work or in schools.

Please contact me with your situation and needs.


Anger Management

I can run workshops on different aspects of anger management, according to your preferences.

I think that it is useful to start by understanding why people feel angry. I believe that nobody feels angry without good a reason. I suggest that it is helpful to look at anger first as a feeling, as a messenger letting you know that something is not working well for you and preparing you to respond to a bad situation that needs to be changed. Anger as a feeling is not bad in itself, it is just energy and it can be channelled to help you stand up for yourself.

Anger can also be caused by a distorted interpretation of reality and lead you to respond in a way that is out of proportion. That is why it is important to stop and think and then consider if your thoughts are appropriate.

I think that it is not the feeling “anger” that causes problems, but how you act after you feel angry. I encourage people to make this separation between the feeling and the behaviour very clearly.

It is common for people, when they feel anger, to react either by bottling it up or by expressing it aggressively. Both ways can cause damage. Ultimately they may well not help to change situations effectively.

I can teach you how to recognise your anger, understand it and express it in ways that will help you to get what you want more effectively and maintain good relationships with others.


Program of Events